My year of 58 nos
I swung for the fences in 2024. What I learned from striking out.
2024 was the year I swung for the fences. I queried big-name agents. I pitched essays to major publications. I applied to residencies, contests, scholarships, and workshops.
I struck out 100% of the time. I heard “no” 58 times this year.
Thank you for sending us your work; while it was not a fit, we appreciated the chance to consider it.
Thank you for sending us your submission and for your patience while it was under consideration. We’re sorry to say that your piece was not selected for publication.
Thank you for submitting your application. Unfortunately, your project was not selected for the competitive 2024 residency program.
Thank you so much for your patience as we reviewed your manuscript. Unfortunately, we cannot continue to move forward at this time.
Those were just a few that replied. When you don’t hear back after days, weeks, months, then yeah, it’s a “no.”
Rejection is part of being a writer. Even
, a best-selling author who’s written multiple books, says so.Though I added no publication credits to my CV and didn’t receive a single agent offer of representation, 2024 wasn't a total wash.1
Almost-theres with my manuscript
As soon as I sent my query package (this includes a pitch letter and your book’s first 5-10 pages), a handful of agents asked to read my full manuscript. This was EXCITING. People say this process can take months and months, but I had interest within a couple weeks.
I waited while they read my book. Then they all passed.
I maintain no illusions about how hard it is to sell a non-celebrity memoir to commercial publishers. And yet! Several agents considered taking me on as a client. A few even sent kind notes and feedback. Agents are inundated with queries from hopeful writers with books. The fact that they took time to read mine and respond was huge. Clearly something about my story and writing resonated with them.
I can say that now. It didn’t feel like that at the time. I felt like an Olympian who crossed the finish line in fourth place. Fourth place doesn’t put you on the podium.
I considered querying another batch of agents, but deep down I knew what the agents who passed were telling me. My manuscript was pretty good, but not good enough. If I want the best possible chance to sell my book to a Big Five publisher, I had to make it great.
Revising with fresh eyes and a clear mind
My book was missing an important layer. I revealed hardly anything about my adult self. My memoir is written almost entirely from my child point-of-view, and I wanted to keep it this way. But I couldn't figure out how to include my adult self without resorting to a clunky back-and-forth dual narrative timeline.
I set my manuscript aside for several months while I trained for a marathon over the summer. This fall, I enrolled in a GrubStreet class and took another crack at revising. I played around with slipping backwards and forwards in time inside of chapters. Something started clicking.
The book is getting so much better. I wish I had been able to write like this before, have more fun with it. A year ago I couldn’t. Why?
I needed to take a giant step back. Time away from my manuscript helped me return with fresh eyes. I’ve been cranking on this thing for four years. Not entirely non-stop as I’ve taken some breaks for life stuff (e.g., have a baby), but it’s always been on my mind. This summer I did not think about the book at all. That break was necessary.
I needed to prioritize my health. When I returned to my manuscript this fall, I felt more physically and mentally healthy than I’ve felt in 2-3 years. Thanks to therapy, running, community, sleep, and other factors I really felt good. This made me able to bring my best self and energy to the page.
Publishing my own essays
Over the summer I pitched an essay to several publications about how I found new reasons to run after becoming a mother. When my essay was rejected, I decided to self-publish it here instead.
This one's for the record books went on to become one of my most-read posts, and I received a ton of responses to it. A few people even told me in person it resonated with them. That made me really happy. All I wanted was to share this with the world and for people to read it.
Launching Home Stories
After receiving so much rejection this year, I didn’t think I could stand to hear “no” again. I stopped applying and submitting.
Instead I put my energy towards an idea I’d been kicking around for awhile. I launched Home Stories, an interview series featuring writers and the enduring impact of their childhood homes.
It’s risky to launch something new. What if the whole thing just fell flat on its face? I was pleasantly surprised by how many people were open to participating A huge thanks to
, Rebecca Kuder, Danielle Hayden, and for sharing your stories this year.The Home Stories series has been an unexpected source of joy and connection. It's creatively fulfilling to me, and I love giving other writers a platform for their stories.
Looking to 2025
In a couple months I’ll be ready to query agents again with my revised manuscript. I also plan to apply to a few residencies and workshops. Maybe, just maybe, 2025 will be my year of “yes.”
You might also like
A couple teeny wins. I was a finalist in my genre for The Kenyon Review Developmental Editing Fellowship for Emerging Writers and runner up for the Jane Barnes Creative Non-Fiction Fellowship.
Finalist and runner-up are huge deals to celebrate! I predict big things coming your way. Here's to, as you said, agented manuscripts for us both in 2025 (or whenever!) and big successes down the road. <3
Oy, I hate to confess this, but your rejections have actually encouraged me to be more ambitious (because I know rejection is a passing phase in your work) AND, more important, your new approach to your manuscript is downright inspiring. I also know somehow that you will succeed. It's in the stars, the cards, your DNA, I dunno, but I am certain we'll see you in print.